Mycena Cave Chat Fiasco
Hey all. I was originally going to submit this to that confessions blog, but I figure enough of my followers here are from MC and I’ll post it to the tag that it’ll get seen. Hopefully.
Anyway, I’m the reason the chat got taken down. Feel free to throw your tomatoes now. Get it out of your system.
Here’s what went down, in detail, so anyone who wasn’t there can get a feel for what actually happened, rather than through here-say and whatever else sources have been coming in.
I was in the chat with a small number of other people. A particular user mentioned how they liked a pairing between the characters Elsa from Frozen and Joffery from Game of Thrones. I, somewhat out of jest, and somewhat out of a true dislike for the latter character, argued the pairing. I acknowledge that sometimes my humor doesn’t come across well in text. This is likely one of those incidents, and I’m pretty sure I came across much more aggressive than I intended. The user then went on to say how they identified with said character, which bothered me significantly. Yes, I understand these characters are fictional, but they have specific traits and morals all the same, and so it made me nervous.
I brought up the fact that this character, and another that had been brought up in the conversation, were known rapists and murderers, and that this fact made me uncomfortable that someone was identifying as them.
I brought it up. There was no joking about it, it was being used to shine only negative light on the situation. In retrospect, yes, it was a poor choice. I can’t change that now.
I reiterated how uncomfortable the identifying with those characters made me, and exited chat. I then contacted the user through a third party and asked them to avoid directly interacting with me in the future. The situation was handled.
I did not go out of chat to contact an admin. During the event itself, a mod was present in the chat. They left shortly before I did. Secondly, I didn’t feel the situation was volatile enough to warrant intervention. It was primarily a personal matter, likely something anyone else in the chat at the time could tell you.
I took the initiative to handle the situation myself. Even though I had asked the user to avoid contact with me, I also gave them as much space as I could. I never once asked them to leave chat because it made me uncomfortable, or anything of the like. I thought the situation was handled.
It was shortly after that that the first confession appeared on that blog. This one was quite tame. In fact I’m under the impression that it was only made in good faith. But the posts that followed it were clearly made by people who didn’t witness the events, and they seemed to misconstrue the information in that post.
They started attacking the people who had done nothing wrong.
I do not agree with the removal of the chat. I honestly feel that a few users were really the ones causing issue, and I’m disappointed that rather than tackling those users head on, the chat was just removed instead. I’m also disappointed that there was no formal announcement. The note about its removal isn’t even up anymore. The notice itself felt very condescending to me, especially when I was feeling as guilty as I already was, and felt like it placed the blame solely on the users, which again I disagree with completely.
I’m trying to remedy the situation as best I can, partially by helping open the AIM chat and by slipping back primarily into lurker mode. If anyone’s uncomfortable with me technically owning the aim chat, I’ll gladly transfer ownership to one of the other operators. I can do that in a heartbeat. I just really want people to stop saying how horrible the chat users are. They’re almost always nothing less than sweet, and some days I found myself getting out of bed only because I knew there’d be pleasant faces in the chat for me to talk to.
I’m sad to see it gone. And I hope you all can understand how truly sorry I am that it’s my fault.